Guys would hate me for this but I have no option but to reveal it.
I am tired of ladies concluding in general terms that there are no good guys anymore while good guys are everywhere. One is even near you now but you don’t appreciate him. Â Yes! Ladies always have this dream of the kind of guy they want. He should be tall, good looking, well behaved, average height, fat pocket, must be lively, well spoken, very presentable, and so on . Some make the mistake of making a list which they tick whenever a guy shows interest for a relationship. If he does not meet all the option, they turn him down. Funny thing is, they are the ones that experience the most heart break because their suppose to be dream man is a player.
Players will always leave you for another girl. This is not saying you shouldn’t have preference of the kind of man you want in your life. You should, but be realistic about it so you don’t fall for a player. Wondering how to know one? Here are some things to watch out for:
HE IS GOOD LOOKING, CHARMING AND CONFIDENT
You can’t take this away from players. It is their call card and ladies love this. This is why they get the ladies more than the good guys every lady should desire. They know their good looks, charm, and confidence attract the ladies, why should they stick to one? These guys know what you want to hear and how to tell you without blinking. Your first time of meeting them will be like you have known them all your life. They will make you laugh, smile, even blush till they touch your soft spot. Everything will be happening fast that you won’t care. Whenever you meet a guy for the first and all this happen, there is 80% possibility he is a player. This is not saying all charming, good-looking, and confident guys are players. Some faithful ones possess these qualities.
HE IS OBSESSED WITH HIMSELF
Have you met a guy that is obsessed with himself? He is a player. He is so proud about how girls follow him about like bees in a beehive, how his achievements and looks get him wherever, whatever, and whomever he wants. He won’t value you if that is what you want. He is a player. Except otherwise, he is not a wise choice for a good relationship
YOU ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP BUT HE NEVER CALL
Getting to hear from someone you love is something you can’t take away from a relationship that works. Phone calls in this our generation has made it more fun and interesting. You can last all day on the phone with someone you love if there is no restriction. I still remember one funny experience a friend of mine had with his girlfriend in school. We were writing mathematics test, the both of them had their heads on their papers sleeping. At the end of the test, Â they submitted empty scripts. Feeling sorry for them, we asked why they were sleeping in class and discovered both of them talked all through the night on phone forgetting they had a test the following day.
That’s how much you can go on phone calls with someone you love. Are you the only one calling in your relationship? Know he is playing on you. If he love you and care about you, he will do more of the calling. Players don’t call except they want a thing with you, once they have got it, they will stop calling. If you keep up with the calls, they will put you on hold. It will get to an extent they will block you from calling. Don’t let it get to this. Give yourself some value. You are a lady and should be the one to be chased not the one doing the chasing.
PAY HIM UNEXPECTED VISITS
This one is very effective and the surest way to know a player and beat him in his game. One key here is, take note of guys that want you to visit only when they call you. That’s key he has another girl by the side. Many have testified to this. Why will he want you to visit on his call alone? Its a relationship not a business meeting.
Wondering when to pay him this visit? You instinct will tell you he is playing on you. Â Its the time you are sure he will be home but when you call he tells you he is not around or out of town. Some girls won’t call, they will just visit without informing him. Its best to call and inform him that you want to visit so when you get to his house and meet him at home, he will know you know his game.
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HE WANTS TO MEET YOU ALONE ALL THE TIME
Players have intent. Make you fall in love with them, sleep with you, and leave you. Why do you think he always want to meet you alone all the time? Its simply because he wants to satisfy his sexual desire which will only be possible when you are alone. Someone that love you will be happy to meet you anytime even when you are busy with friends and family. Â Has he been visiting only when you are alone? Know he is a player. He doesn’t want anything serious with you. You should be his companion, not a sex appointment.
HE EYES AT ANOTHER WOMAN TOO OFTEN
The eyes of a player communicate before his mouth. A player can pass his message with his eyes to a lady without saying a word. You can be with your player boyfriend seated opposite in a restaurant engaged in a conversation, at the same time he will be speaking with the girl next table without you noticing. Sometimes it will be obvious, they will tell you itâ€™s just a simple admiration. They have passed their message. You are there to have a good time with each other not sightseeing. You should have just gone sightseeing so you know he has no hidden intention. If he cares he will focus on you since you have his heart. A guy that truly cares about you will control his eyes not to offend you.
HE FORCES YOU FOR MORE DRINK THAN NORMAL
Some ladies can drink! Some drink more than men that you would wonder if the blood in their vein is alcohol. If you are that type, this point is not for you. I trust you will be the one to get the guy drinking above his limit (drunk). If you don’t drink much, watch it if you are on a date with a guy and he keeps urging you to drink above your limit. Itâ€™s a key he is a player that wants to take advantage of you and blame it on the alcohol. Itâ€™s no alcohol, its intentional. Part of a players trick to get girls to bed. A guy that truelly care about you will not allow you drink above your limit.
HE TOUCHES YOU MORE THAN NECESSARY
Players are normally bold and forward. Some of them go for the touch even if you are meeting for the first time. They don’t care if you get hurt by their actions. That is why you have to be careful with them not to send the wrong signal that you are in for whatever they want. If you are meeting a guy or you are in the company of a guy you don’t want to be intimate with and he is touching you in places he shouldn’t, be polite enough to ask him to stop. Not asking him to stop means you are in for what he wants.
If he is a guy you want to get intimate with, I don’t advice you allow him the touch on a first date. It will make you appear cheap. If he is already your boyfriend and he touches you more than necessary like smacking your butt in public and in front of your friends or Â parents, know he is not in for anything serious. He just want to have sex. Am not saying every guy that smack your butt in public is a player. Some people just don’t know how to express love. They need to be taught. If your boyfriend is in this category, teach him how to love you right.
SEX IS WHAT HE WANTS AND HE DOESNT HIDE IT.
Some playboys don’t hide their intentions. From the onset of the relationship they make it known to you that they are in it for sex. If you meet them online, your conversations will always be raw. They don’t hide how bad they want to get under your skirt. Â From your first date they start getting intimate without asking you out. They don’t bother about your feelings. Such guys only visit you or ask you to come around when they want to meet up for sex. The mistake girls make is, they think they can trap such guys to love them. You can’t. If you do, kudos you are a rare gem.
HE HARDLY COMPLEMENTS YOU
Players don’t give complements. The best they will do is tell you: “You are Hot”, Or “you have a smoking body”. They will never tell you, “you are beautiful”. Â They might do at the beginning of the relationship to get you where they want you. After one or two sexual encounters, they will stop complementing you. Key is to keep you coming and hoping to win their heart. Have you ever wondered why you know your boyfriend is cheating or playing on you and you keep going back? Itâ€™s because you have become their slave. Not complementing you and showing they care about you, keep you in the position of thinking you have something to prove to them. That’s the slavery. A guy that truly cares about you will complement you always when it calls for.
HE LIKES TO SHOW YOU ARE UNDER HIS CONTROL TO HIS FRIENDS
Players like to show they are in charge. They like showing you are under their control. They make it more obvious when they are with their friends. Have you ever been in the company of your boyfriend and his friends and observed he was displaying some possessive attitude towards you? He is a player. Of course his friends already know you are his girlfriend and you are definitely submissive to him, why show it to them? Players receive hypes from their friends doing this. The more possessive they get, the higher their hype. You should be respected, not treated like a playing card.
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HE MEETS YOU IN HIS TERMS
Relationships are sweet when the persons involved are free with each other. They visit each other whenever they want; better ones even leave their apartment key with their partner. That’s a relationship where nobody has anything to hide. In this kind of relationship, your partner would appreciate it when you pay them surprise visits. A relationship where you are being played is otherwise. Players meet you in their own terms. They tell you when to visit and when not to. If they don’t call and ask you to visit them, you shouldn’t. If you do, they get angry and send you back. At first they will treat you right, when you have given in to sex; they will start telling you not to visit except they ask you to. Why on earth should you be treated that way if he is not playing on you? He should be happy to see you and want to meet you if he truly loves you. The guy you are dating is guilty of this? He is playing on you.
YOU CANâ€™T TOUCH HIS PHONE AND COMPUTER
Players are very personal with their phones and computer. You can touch anything but not these two. Whenever you get close to their phone or computer, they get angry except itâ€™s on password. The ones that use password have all the password apps every phone or computer can have. Ask them for the password, they will tell you to mind your business. Itâ€™s probably because there is something there they don’t want you to see. Probably you might find some other girls name that they save with something sweeter than yours , they have other girls they are seeing on their phonebook you will know ( sometimes your best friend, sister, or your neighbour next door ), or their social media account is complicated. A guy that loves you will allow you access to their phone and computer. The ones that use password will give you the password even use your name as it.
HE IS FLIRTATIOUS WITH OTHER GIRLS IN YOUR PRESENCE
Get in the skirt of girls, girls, and more girls at any cost, are the number one goal of players. Along the line, they add other goals.Â Those goals are not my concern here. The number one goal is my concern. Players don’t care about whose girl is with them, they always have eyes for other girls. They might not be complementing you, don’t be shocked when they tell another girl in your present what they never tell you. She is their next in line. Sometimes itâ€™s same thing they tell you that makes you thing you are special to them that they will tell the girl. They most painful one is when they take you out and they meet a girl they like or you introduce them to your friend and they start talking non-stop about how attractive the new girl is. If she is sharing a table with the both of you, he will sideline you in whatever conversation you are having and concentrate on the new face. Its a clue you mean nothing to him. Â You deserve more, my dear; cancel every dream you have with him. Â
HIS OPINION ABOUT GETTING SERIOUS IS OTHERWISE
If there is any conversation that bores players, itâ€™s the one about getting serious. They always wave it or find another issue to cover it whenever you bring it up. They are not thinking about getting serious anytime. If he is a guy you re crushing on, try to find his opinion about getting serious. Players are never positive about getting serious except they want to impress you. Check to see if they have a thing for you before you seek their opinion about this. If they do, their opinion will be positive to impress you; best way to find out if he is lying is to check how he treat ladies round him. If he is flirtatious with them, know he won’t be serious with you.
HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND YOU KNOW BUT HE IS ASKING YOU OUT
Many ladies make the mistake of thinking a guy that has a girlfriend they know will treat them better or leave her for them, even when they know he is not treating his girlfriend right. He won’t treat you better. You are just another fun fair for him. Sometimes he will feed you lies about how the relationship with the other girl is not working and how you and him will work. Never fall for this. Threaten to tell his girlfriend he is asking you out and see his reaction. You will be surprised he won’t care. Some will even insult you and ask you to go ahead. Players don’t have conscience at all when it comes to dishing girls.
HE FORGET DETAILS ABOUT YOUR LIFE
The most dominant thing in a players head is what he wants from a woman and how to get it, other details are his strategies and personal dreams. He never keeps details about the girls he is with for they are many. A player will forget things about you like your favourite colour, food, book, genre of movie, family background, Â birthday date, Â and other important things you have told him several times. Wondering why? Its because you don’t mean a thing to him. They are just in for sex and what they can get from you. Other things don’t matter to them. They might remember your favourite hangout joint though if they met you there. It might be theirs as well and you might not be the only one they have met there. I know one guy that sees movies in a cinema over and over again just to get girls. The cinema to him is a hunting ground for classy girls, not that he really enjoys seeing the movies over and over again. He does this to get the girls. Every time I visit, I see him with a new girl buying ticket for a movie I know he has seen a couple of times.Â
THEY NEVER TALK ABOUT THEIR DREAMS AND ASPIRATIONS WITH YOU IN IT
You only discuss your dreams and aspirations with someone that means something to you. If a relationship is going somewhere, both partners will reveal their dreams and aspirations to one-another. This is will set a foundation for the relationship in which other things will rest, since both partners already know where they are headed and how things will turn out in the future.
A player will never discuss his dreams and aspirations with you if he is playing on you, nor will he put you in it except he is on the benefiting angle. The only thing he will want to do with you is have sex or talk about it.
In the situation, where he is benefiting from you may be financially or otherwise and stand to lose a lot if he let you go, he will put you in it and pretend he cares if you push it. The best way to test him if you are in this situation is to stop letting him have whatever he is benefiting from you for a long time and see his reaction. Don’t let him know your intention. Just cook up a story to let him know he won’t be benefiting from you any longer.
HE REFUSES TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Someone that loves you and care about you will be interested in meeting your friends and family. This will in a way seal the relationship and make it more formal. Players will never be interested in meeting your friends or family members for they don’t want to be serious or attached to you. Other reason might be they are afraid of seeing someone that knows them for who they are.
HIS BEST FRIENDS ARE PLAYERS
They say, “show me your friends I will tell you who you are”. Players mainly hang around with players. If he has a flock of friends, only few will be faithful lovers. The ones he will hang around most with will also be players. Take time to know the friends your boyfriend or that guy asking you out love hanging out with. Are they treating ladies right or they are acting otherwise. If they act otherwise, know he is a player. Â Birds of the same feather they say, flocks togetherÂ
HE IGNORES SOME PHONE CALL WHEN YOU ARE AROUND
Is he sensitive about his phone calls when you are around? He is a player. Players are always guilty of being sensitive to some phone call when their new catch is around. Such phone calls are from the other girls they are seeing. Some would ignore the call, if you ask them to pick up, they will say its not important or its some girls bugging their life. If you have been in such situation, know you will be that one girl, someday. Others will pick up and make the call brief or tell the caller they are busy and they will call later. These are masters they have been playing girls for long. The ones that are not deep into the playing game yet will either excuse you to take it or act like there is problem in the network connection.
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HE DOES NOT ACCEPT INNOVATIVE DATES AFTER HE HAS HAD SEX WITH YOU
Innovative dates bore players once they have had their way with you. They will always turn it down even if you are the one paying the bills. Your relationship with them is strictly for your body and nothing more that’s if you have nothing more to offer. At first, they might pretend to enjoy your company, even foot the bills for innovative dates when they are chasing you. Once they have gotten what they want from your body, they are done. To them, you women are a challenge to conquer. Once they conquer you by having all the sexual encounters they can with you, they move on to the next challenge. If he is not accepting innovative dates and accepting sexual dates, he is playing on you.
HE IS NOT ANXIOUS TO PLEASE YOU
He will be anxious to please you at the beginning of the relationship. This is to commit you. He will call, tell, and often organise surprise dates. Everything will change when you allow him have his way sexually as time goes on. You will observe he no longer call, text, or even want to go out on dates with you. You will be the one doing all that. It will get to an extent he will no longer be taking your calls. Pleasing you is no longer important to him. Wondering why? All that attention is being given to his new catch.
HE ACTS WEIRD WHEN HE RUNS INTO YOU IN PUBLIC
Surprises wow us. Meeting someone important in a public place where you least expect to meet them wow us more. The pleasantries we exchange with them, the joy of getting to meet someone we could relate with in a crowd of strangers overpowers us. Then the conversations will go on like we could talk all day nonstop. It wasn’t so when you met your boyfriend in a public place you least expected to meet him? He was there with another girl.
I guess the conversation was brief? He was stuttering and using ‘hmmmmmmmmm’? He wasn’t comfortable meeting you? He told you he was there for business but didn’t allow you meet his business partner and made sure you got out of sight before he returned to whatever brought him there? He is playing on you.
HE IS ALWAYS ACTING TOO BUSY FOR YOU AND CREATING PLENTY OF TIME FOR OTHERS
This one is straight up. He has had what he wants from you and giving you signal that you no longer mean a thing to him. If he cares, he will create time for you no matter how busy he gets. He says he is busy but still creates time for after hours hangout with his friends, watch football match, and goes clubbing on weekends. Busy people will miss out on these if they have something at hand that requires all their attention.
You are the good and understanding type, you overlook all these and offer to ease his stress but he gives excuses. Take note of the excuses he gives and pop it up some other day you will discover he has forgotten exactly what he told you. Take out time to follow him up, you will find out there is a new girl in his life. Look back to the beginning of the relationship, it wasn’t so I guess? You were his priority and he created more time for you even when he was busy. He even spends his off days with you. What has happened? You did nothing wrong to deserve your current treatment right? He is just his selfish self. A player
HE IS RELUCTANT TO COMMIT TO THINGS CONCERNING YOU FOR LONG
A Player will never commit to things concerning you for long except they have something to benefit from it. If you have a long term goal to meet for example and you ask them to help you achieve it, they will back out before even reaching the middle. Reason is, you are not their priority, why help you out? It will even disturb their plan for you. Every player wants to get into your skirt as soon as possible and move to another girl. The commitment will disturb this. Your goals in life doesn’t concern or mean a thing to them. What they want from you is a good time in bed till they get tired.
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HIS CLOSE FRIENDS DONT TAKE YOU SERIOUS
I know of a situation where a girlâ€™s boyfriend took her to a party with friends in an hotel. As they partied, she got tipsy and asked her boyfriend to take her to the room reserved for them, he asked his friend to help him take her to the room. When they got the room, his friend made attempt to kiss her and off her clothes thinking she was drunk. Surprised, she hesitated and pushed him away then left the room to her boyfriend crying. When she narrated what happened to him, he laughed and said it was no big deal. This is just one of it, has your boyfriends friend ask you out? Know he is a player and he doesn’t take you serious. If he does, his friend will never ask you out. Some will even make move to touch you in sensitive parts of your body as if they are the ones dating you. Â Ask yourself, what will give his friend the guts to disrespect you? He must have told him you are just another girl he has had his way with and there is nothing serious. Friends of a guy that take you serious will respect you like they respect him. You in their midst will be like him even if he is not there.
HE DOESNT CALL YOU HIS GIRLFRIEND IN FRONT OF OTHERS
Players are known to not introduce a girl on their playbook to others as their girlfriend. Least they will do is to introduce you by your name. Reason is, they don’t want anything serious with you and they don’t want to appear as a player. If they start introducing every girl they make out with two people as their girlfriend, people will know they are players. Â A guy that is serious with you will be proud to introduce you to people as his girlfriend.
YOUâ€™RE FEELINGS DOESNT MATTER TO HIM
A playerâ€™s heart is made of stone. Stones feel nothing. It is why they will hurt you and move on to do the same thing they did to you to another girl. Does he care how you feel? One way to know is how he takes your feelings and opinion about things. Does he respect it or itâ€™s only his feelings and opinion that stand in your relationship? If he is selfish know he is playing on you and he doesn’t care. Respecting someone’s feelings and opinion is one of the best ways to show you care about them.
There might be other points on knowing a player that I did no include, or a personal experience that we will learn from, you would love to share. Feel free to use the comment section of this article.
Â Â Â “Don’t ever think it. You have done enough
Â Â Â thinking about someone who wasn’t thinking
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â about you you thesame. Turn the page.
Â Don’t fear what you will loose in the last chapter,
Â Â Â embrace what you are about to gain in the next.
Â Â The story gets better. There is nothing wrong in
Â wanting something real. Leave the game and forget
Â Â Â the player. Someone better is praying for your
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Love.”Â Â Â Â Â Â .Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â
Â Â “. The only way to play a player is to know that
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â what you crave for ,
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â lives within a brief moment.”
Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Susan WinterFollow Love Venture on WordPress.com