Are You in a Relationship or Relation-ship

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Are You in a Relationship or Relation-ship

You have been in a relationship for a while now, you can not hold on anything what he has put into your life and you are planning to get married? I am scared for you.

How can you date a man for 6 months, 2 years, 3 years and even more and all you can reminisce are memories and just good times? You can not lay your hands on things and projects he has started with you.

You can only but remember the good times you had, swimming, driving round town, partying and even making love. That’s all.

There’s no tangible evidence of a man in your life. You are still who you use to be, no new achievement, no new project started, no new programme begun, I mean no real improvement.

A phone is not a new thing, a new designer shirt doesn’t count, neither does having a night in Sheraton make any sense. I mean real, tangible and monumental achievement that will be seen all around you.

Your boy friend is a friend that is a boy. He is expected to see your tomorrow as you do and invest deliberately to make it work.

How can you date a man for such a while who have not asked why you haven’t returned to school? why you haven’t collected your result? Why you haven’t completed your HND? Or why you have not enrolled for your Masters degree?

And did you say your woman loves you? But she does not care why you spend the way you do. She keeps asking and collecting without helping you make concrete plans for savings and investments. Any woman who does not add up for your interest in becoming a better man in all ramifications is not good enough for a relationship.

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I have said it times without numbers, that ‘The evidence of a good man in a woman is not her enhanced frame, nor her new acquisitions in her wardrope, nor even her sparkling beauty, it is in her mental development and intellectual capacity, permit me to add, a new project and programme that has kicked off in his time.

We query governments with ‘what has been done in their time to adjudge their achievements’. We consider to re-elect people to offices based on the number of people-oriented programmes and projects they have done before seeking for re-election.

So why do you want to continue with that dude for another year if you can’t lay your hands on his effects in your life?

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How many seminars have you attended together? How many times have you read a book together? When was the last time you had an heated debate about governance, education, politics, religion and morality that you were both sweating and needed to research to balance your argument? When was the last time he spoke to you about a new way to making your school/business blossom.

Listen up, if he spends more money on the cosmetics, that is beauty, show off, parties and other frivolities, then you don’t have a man to look up to, he is of the immediate and ‘Manna does not last’.

Seek for a relationship where a man is ahead of you, breaking new grounds and inspiring you to come. Investing more in your tomorrow and giving you a formidable network to garvanise your own future!

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A responsible husband will first be a responsible boy friend.

A good wife will first be a co-pilot in flying into your dreams fulfilment.

If he hasn’t invested in your future, don’t take him there.

By King Joel Agho

 

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