My Marriage Is Perfect: A Mistake I Must Live With

My Marriage Is Perfect: A Mistake I Must Live With

My marriage is the perfect among the three of us. My husband to Chioma and Funke is the kind of man every woman should marry. Alero never complains of her husband. Whenever Chioma and Funke complain about their husband behaving below their expectation, Alero always says otherwise of her husband to the extent that Chioma started expecting her husband to behave as Aleros husband (perfect), whenever he does otherwise.


I woke up in the least environment I expected to see myself a day after valentine. An hospital bed. I couldn’t feel my legs and face. Last thing I remembered, I was at the office planning the ladies day out that I normally observe with my best friends Chioma and Funke, every valentine day. We go out without our husbands and children and discuss our encounters with guys growing up as girls and how its so different from our present married lives.

As we normally do some days before valentine,  we made arrangements and paid for a space in our favourite relaxation and hangout spot, but we missed the valentine day out. Thanks to my boss and suppose to be perfect husband.

Yes, my boss is my husband. I work under him as the human resource manager of his company. Chioma and Funke, my best friends work in the same company as marketing supervisors. To them, he was a perfect man. We were a perfect couple that every family should emulate, until they discovered the lie in the marriage I have been painting as a perfect one, that bad valentine day.



My GOD! So Alero has been leading a lie? What have I done? My family, my husband, how do I go back to him? Would he accept me back? GOD, I pray he accept me back.I don’t want him to be perfect anymore, like my boss, Aleros husband. If the Aleros condition is what a perfect husband puts his wife, I don’t want Tony to be perfect. I will love him like that. GOD! I couldn’t even recognise her when we got to the hospital room. The all beautiful face that I spend hours in front of the mirror to copy is gone. I don’t think she could feel her face. Look at her legs. ”


I said to myself as Alero stir at the both of us. She couldn’t even say a word. Tear drops from her eyes passed her message. If I was told Prince could do this to a woman, I will look at the person eye ball to eye ball and call him or her, the biggest liar to ever walk the planet earth. Not my boss, not Prince. He is the nicest boss anyone could have.



Alero looked away as my eyes met hers. I know why. I have been right all along, that no marriage is perfect. Usually, whenever we are together and the issues of family come up, I was the only one that held that opinion. I have always learnt from my parent’s marriage, that misunderstandings will sometimes arise between me and my husband. He will not always behave as I expect him to and agree with me on every decision. In every misunderstanding that arises, I always take the part of peace as a wife. People change and grow unbearable, I know. That’s the only time to do otherwise, but after seeking wise counsel.

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Thank GOD for my parents. They might not be rich as Aleros parents, or middle class as Chiomas parents, I don’t see them as poor. Despite their everyday struggles as a taxi driver and a petty trader in the streets of Lagos, they gave their best to bring me and my two younger siblings Dayo and Tokpe up, to be GOD fearing and respectful to everyone we meet. With their earnings, they saw us all three through the university.



My mum left the hospital room soon as Funke and Chioma entered. She didn’t even respond to their greetings. She was angry that the receptionist or whoever is in charge of my room let them in. She must have ordered them no to let anybody in except my family members. She brought us up to be perfect and never get outsiders involved in family matters. My parents never discussed family problems with anyone, not even their trusted friends.  This was why I never let Chioma and Funke in on how my husband has been treating me.  If only I knew I could discuss family problems with my trusted friends that discussed theirs with me, a lot would have been avoided. Chioma wouldn’t have left her husband’s house.


I always presented Prince as a perfect husband whenever they come to me for advice on issues concerning their husbands. Unknown to them that theirs is even better, my misunderstandings with Prince always end up in his throwing punches at me and using his belt like he was fighting another man.

Whenever this happen, I skip the office for weeks and go on a forced leave until I am sure all trace of his maltreatment was gone. I have always admired Funke, not only for her hard work, also for the way she handle her family issues with maturity by taking her husband for who he is and doing her best to make him a better husband. She stood her ground and held her point that no man can be as perfect as I present my husband. How right she was. I have always prayed that Chioma learn from her, but she preferred to be told how to live her life and run her family.

Chioma from our university days has never had a life of her own. She is always doing what others think is right, not what she knows is right. Sometimes I wonder if she has a brain that function on its own without interference. She is always after people’s approval in everything she does. When she met Tony, I thought he would change her, how wrong I was. Tony is so loving and caring that he let her be, despite knowing her flaws, hoping she would change one day. I guess that day has come. The veil covering my struggling marriage that I present as perfect has been removed.

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Prince was not the one I was supposed to marry. I had other guys in my life before agreeing to his proposal. They all well loving and caring but were not as financially buoyant as the kind of man my parents want for me. Their reason is, I need a financially buoyant man to secure my future and that of my children in a hard economy like Nigeria where those that knows nobody at the top end up scrubbing floors for those that know somebody, despite their educational qualifications. My younger sister Tosan proved them wrong and followed her love. But they disowned her. Today, she is the model of the kind of family I would have had if I had had the guts like her to follow my heart.

Our parents brought us together. Prince father is my dad’s political god father. They have always matched us from childhood. My dad thought he was securing my future, unknown to him that he was forcing me into a relationship I would regret. Prince treated me as I would have wanted to and played along until after our honey moon night. I later discovered his father promised to will his assets to him only if he married me. Had I known earlier, I would have followed my heart. Too bad I have to live with my mistake for the rest of my life.

By Tanrose Godwin

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