Relationships are always tough, and things donâ€™t get any easier as time goes on. You donâ€™t get any better at it just because youâ€™ve been on the job longer. With most long-term relationships, there are going to be periods of ennui and speed bumps of tedium along the way. Wandering eyes can also become a problem when anyone spends the bulk of his time with just one person. The most important thing is to be aware of the inevitable lulls or moments of doubt, and to make a plan to counteract them. Just because youâ€™ve been together a long time doesnâ€™t mean you canâ€™t still have fun being in the relationship.
1. Take advantage of new technology; text,chat and call: With so many of us pressed for time, why not use technology to â€œkeep in touchâ€ during the day. A compliment, an affection or a quick â€œHello, You are being thought ofâ€ via text can spark anyoneâ€™s day. You can find any type of sentiment from cute and funny, to serious and romantic or teasingly sexy. The bonus is that you can include a personal message along with it if youâ€™d like.
2. Hold hands, hug and give quick kisses often: Nothing is as good for the soul and the emotional health of a person as the human touch. As teenagers, we hold hands, give quick kisses as hello and goodbye and cuddle as we sit close. Why not keep that sense of youth no matter how old we are or how long we have been have together as a couple? Holding hands keeps a connection and closeness, no matter what we are doing. An enthusiastic hug uplifts us; a quick kiss says â€œglad to see youâ€.
3. Date often: Make dates and anticipate them with excitement. Dress up and look your best. Discover a new cologne or perfume. Set the stage as if you are trying to â€œimpressâ€ the way you did at
the beginning of the relationship. If your budget limits you to a rental movie at home, change it up. Set out cheese and crackers instead of the usual popcorn. Turn off the lights and let your fireplace illuminate the room. No fireplace? Candles do just as well. The point is to set the atmosphere of a date. The desire to look your best, feel your best and have the best time possible will rejuvenate those feelings of a first date.
4. Write old fashioned love letters: There is nothing like the power of the written word. The idea that a person would sit and attempt to convey their feeling through words is not only a
heart warming gesture, but one that can be renewed over and over again through each reread. When you need an emotional lift, you can revisit them and instantly get the emotional recharge. Rereading a partnerâ€™s love letters instantly brings you to the intensity when the relationship was young. Writing letters
throughout the relationship tells your partner those feelings are still alive and well.
5. Praise, praise and thank you…and more praise: Rather than concentrating on what he or she â€œdoesnâ€™t do anymoreâ€, think about what he/she does. He may not bring you flowers as he did in the beginning of your courtship, but his consideration in packing your lunch or giving you some time with the girls is another type of â€œblossomâ€. If she doesnâ€™t seem to be as affectionate as when you first dated, appreciate her watching the game with you, especially if she is not a sports fan. The saying. â€œseeing your glass full or half emptyâ€ has validity. If we compliment people on what they DO, instead of harping on what they donâ€™t, weâ€™d be surprised how responsive a person can be. Being appreciated with a â€œthank youâ€, makes most people enthusiastic about doing more. Complimenting your partner on their qualities of patience or creativity will easily be a high point in their day. And with enough Thank yous and compliments, you never know. That bouquet of flowers might just follow.
6. Learn something â€œnewâ€ together: don’t just take everything for granted. There is nothing bad in going for a swimming lesson every saturday with your partner just to create another kinda spark. Take dance lessons, take an art class or learn to ice skate together! Take a day trip to a new place neither of you have ever visited before. If you look back on your life, you probably connected with people whom you shared new events or experiences, something you experienced together for the first time. Those experiences create closeness. Find something that can be a â€œfirstâ€ for the two of you. You might also develop a new interest the two of you can enjoy!
7. Make love often and with passion: The beauty of a long term sexual relationship is that the intimacy builds over the years. That intimacy makes sex much more genuine, gratifying and fulfilling. It is also an area that is not often put high on the importance scale. Work, career, school, and kids often exhaust our energy so we find it hard to â€œbe in the mood.” Make the intimate part of your relation a high priority. Make time for â€œlove sessions.” Take time to â€œmake loveâ€ rather than just have sex. Use candles, perfume, or whatever that is that get your juices flowing. Like all else in life, intimacy dies if it is not nourished. Feeding it with affection, compliments and time will make it something that feels less like an obligation at the end of a hard day, but something to look forward to.
8. Strengthen your conversation bond and connect more: If you find yourself with â€œnothing to talk about anymoreâ€, find something to start the conversation. Fill your partner in on the â€œfunnyâ€œ things that happened at work, the gossip; anything trivial and interesting. Remember, we all need to use our partners as a â€œsounding board,” but if that is the only conversation that we are having with our â€œsignificant other,” even the most sympathetic listener can have a breaking point. Make â€œsharing your dayâ€ a pleasure event, not a dreaded evil. Connect more by creating a good avenue and bond for it. Don’t be rigid or too serious. Be flexible
9. Be a good listener: There still is the time when your partner will need you to be there, just to listen. You have probably heard the joke a thousand times and heard the family issue twice
that often, so listening to your partner is not always easy. The extra effort, however, can be priceless. Remember, often people donâ€™t want their problems solved, just a shoulder to lean on.
Taking away the burden of â€œfixing it,” might make it easier.
10. Take care of yourself; mind, body and spirit: Be passionate about life. There is truth to the belief that if we nourish the child in us our spirits can stay young, even when our outer body doesnâ€™t. Stay young in mind and spirit. Take care of your health, emotional and physical. It is much easier to keep a relationship young when you exude that aura yourself. Start by keeping yourself â€œyoung at heart.” Keeping a relationship vibrant for years can be a challenge, but that doesnâ€™t have to be a negative. As with all challenges, once achieved, the success becomes much sweeter,the accomplishment more exhilarating. That kind of energy is certain to give a kick start to anyoneâ€™s relationship!
11. Try to understand the other person perfectly: You might be of two completely different mindsets, but you must know you are together because you are meant to be. So don’t spoil it. Whenever the other person does something wrong or doesn’t arrive on time, don’t start by being so aggressive. You must first ask the person what happened in a calm way and tell that you understand, so don’t worry. These small consoling words can strengthen your relationship greatly.Follow Love Venture on WordPress.com