There is nothing as a PERFECT RELATIONSHIP. Many will argue out this fact having a relationship in mind they mirror as a model of one they will like to get into in the future. Some will tell you about their parents or a mentor, or family relation they look up to having a relationship as theirs, considering the time they have been together and it is still evident that the relationship is waxing stronger instead of going the other way like it is common today.
As in life, problems in relationships are inevitable. They will come, whether we expect them or not. in fact I advice you expect problems in your relationship .It will help you make it one that people will look up to like the above mentioned ones. Why you will ask?
Problems are not problems if we are expecting them. Before they will occur, we would have put things in place to solve them.
This is the best mentality with which we must approach any relationship. Expect problems and figure out ways you can solve them to make your relationship better and stronger.
On problems we encounter in relationships and how to solve them, here are the basic ones I think you will encounter and how to handle them:
I will be treating infidelity here from three angles:
1) Â From the angle of cheating on your partner. Cheating is a common problem in relationships and marriage. It has led to the crash of many relationships and marriage. Nothing pains more in relationships like trusting someone with your whole heart to the extent of dedicating your life to them in marriage and in the end find out that they have someone else in their life occupying your place when you are not with them even after the marriage vow. It has led many to commit crimes that have grave consequences. Its better you don’t go into a relationship than play with someone’s heart. Too bad many of us don’t care. We just want the fun of the moment and move to the next available person. If you are of this habit, think about this, what if you are the one truly into the relationship and your partner is the one playing with you? How would you feel? No matter how strong you think your heart is, no one enjoys being taken for granted. Think about this the next time you are about taking someone for granted in the name of being in a relationship with them or you are into a relationship and you know for sure that your partner is faithful to you and you won’t be faithful to them.
2) From the rumour angle. Infidelity in some cases is not really infidelity. They are just mere accusations sometimes from rumours we hear or from our own personal insecurity. Statistics shows that those that cheat on their partners are first to accuse their partner of cheating or believe rumours that their partner is cheating on them. If you are of this habit, find a way to curtail it. It will only destroy the beautiful relationship you would have enjoyed with your partner. Get your facts right before you start acting. I advise you close your ear to rumours and end your relationship with everyone telling you your partner is cheating on you when you know very well they are not.
3) Causing our partner to cheat on us. Sometimes, we are the ones that push our partner to cheat on us by cheating on them. Different people react to cheating different ways. While some will endure it till their partner decides to change, others will call the relationship to a quit, others will clap back by cheating even with their partners best friends.
Whatever you do, cheating back is not the best way to treat a cheating partner. Let them know you know they are cheating on you but you won’t cheat back. It does a magic if your partner will change. If they continue cheating talk to people u know they respect a great deal, about it. If they continue cheating, you can end the relationship. Some days you will surely find someone that will respect and treat Â you right. I never advice divorce because itâ€™s a very painful way to end a marriage. If you have to and you know itâ€™s the only way out, go for it.
“Never allow someone to be a priority in your life, when you know you are an option in theirs.”
People react to s*x differently in a relationship. Religious people would go for platonic relationship until marriage; others don’t mind having s*x before marriage. However you see s*x, it makes the list of problems relationships encounter. S*x has a lot to contribute to how well people in a relationship or marriage get along with each other. For married and not married couples, it is commonly believed that s*x cements the relationship and makes it stronger but we find out it doesn’t in many cases. People have s*x and still break up even in marriage and go their separate ways never to come back together.,. So forget that belief. Its old school
Regarding it, its best you marry or get into a relationship with someone that sees it as you see it. Someone that believes in abstinence until marriage won’t do well in a relationship with someone that believes its doesn’t matter if you have s*x before marriage. It can never work except they agree to compromise and come to an agreement on how to approach s*x that will favor both parties. In many cases, one person will compromise to his or her partners want and later discover they have made the wrong decision. If you are in this situation, call your partner and tell him or her how you feel and the changes the relationship require regardingÂ s*x. IF they don’t see things from your angle, do what’s best for you and right but don’t ever think you can keep a man with s*x, it will fail
DIFFERENCE IN CORE VALUES AND BELIEFS
This one is to be given a proper consideration if you must get into a relationship or marriage. You must know the core values and beliefs of the person you are about going into a relationship with or marrying. Relationships in which your core values and beliefs doesn’t match never go far before both parties call it to an end. Think about it, you don’t want to have a separate home where some of the children will go with your beliefs and core values, and the others your partners. The home is already separated. With no disrespect to Islam, I once tried dating a Muslim girl, the relationship lasted for only a week and we parted. We had a good drink together one day after the relationship ended and laughed about how the relationship didn’t work out because of our core beliefs and values. Don’t get me wrong, am not saying if you a Christian don’t date Muslim ladies, NO. It didn’t work for me, it might work for you. Â I have seen it work for some. if it will work for you, go for it. They are some exceptional cases. But its best you date or marry someone whose beliefs and core values work with yours.
This one has a lot to do with the mentality of the people involved in the relationship or marriage. Some won’t want their partner to be richer than them or higher than them, career wise. Most especially men, we like to be the superior oneÂ career wise, being the figure head of the marriage or relationship. Who say itâ€™s a crime or its bad if you are a man and your partner is higher than you career wise? You should wish them the best if you truly love them. Besides their success is yours as well so its best you be happy for them. Women on the other hand sometimes gets puffed up when they rise above their partner career wise. Especially those ladies fully into the emancipation of the female gender and the feminism thing
If you must enjoy your relationship as a lady, never let yourself get puffed up if you rise above your partner career wise. Make him see and know this doesn’t change the fact that he is still the head of the marriage or relationship.
TRAUMATIC LIFE CHANGING EVENTS
No one wish this to happen in their relationship, but wishes are not horses. We can only wish but what will happen will happen, we have no control over what life bring to us every day. The way of life
Many relationships have failed due to this. I know a couple that are very kind. Â Ten years passed in their relationship after marriage still no issue. Thank GOD for adoption, they recently adopted two children, a boy and girl they are bringing up as their own. This one is a little better. Others during the course of the relationship experience, their partner get involved in accidents that cause the relationship challenges that lead to the end of a once dreamed forever together. Like an accident that led to the amputation of the wife of a newly wedded couple on their honeymoon day. Only people with a golden heart which is hard to come by these days will still stick to their partner in such situation. If you ever find yourself in such situation, know and take it that itâ€™s the best time to stick to your partner and show the world how to LOVE AND WHAT TRUE LOVE IS like the husband of a onetime Most Popular Australian Model that stood with her and is still standing with her after a deadly fire accident that changed her looks. Â They are one couple you must study to help you. Â Never forsake your partner in such times. Your standing by them will encourage others like that coupleâ€™s relationship is helping others now, worldwide.
RESPONSE TO STRESS
People respond to stress differently. Some react as they would normally with people even when they are stressed, some expect them to be understood when under stress, some over react, some isolate themselves, others express it raising their voice at others around them at that moment. Whatever way you respond to stress will affect your relationship. As emotional creatures, others around us are affected by the way we treat them when stressed. Try to understand your partner and know how to relate with them when they are stressed. , give them the time if they are the type that will like isolation. Give them the time and let them know later that you are there to help them ease up. For the others and the way they react to stress, find a way to get along with them and help them relax. This will help you avoid the problems being under stress can cause your relationship. If you are the one pushing your partner away when you are stressed, know you are destroying your relationship. Find a way to get along with them and help them help you ease your stress. For me, I love isolating myself when stressed my partner know. She rests her head on my chest whenever she sees me in that mood and we both stay silent like that for hours. It helps relieve my stress faster than I would have done alone. Understanding your partner and how they behave when stressed is the key here.
As much as we will not want to accept, boredomÂ will be there in the relationship sometimes. Itâ€™s up to us to find a way to handle it. Some want their relationship to be like that in their favorite romantic movie. They think every momentÂ in the relationship should be interesting,Â like that of the movie. This makes them bored and tired of their partner. Movies are scripted to get your attention. The writers take their time alongside others that work on the movie to make it that interesting. You can do same in your relationship. Look for ways to make it more interesting. You can bring in things that interest both of you or learn things that interest your partner that you have not been giving attention, to surprise them. Elements of surprises are the best way to break boredom. One thing about boredom you should appreciate in your relationship is, it teaches you how to make the relationship more interesting.
If you enjoy this article, don’t be the only one to gain from it, pls use the social share buttons to share this article with your friends on various social media. you might be saving someone from relationship problemsFollow Love Venture on WordPress.com