Why You Must Be Selfish When it Comes to Relationship


We are in a world where life is not fair and for you to be successful in your relationship you must be selfish.



Don’t get me wrong when I say selfish I don’t mean you shouldn’t share whatever you have with your partner, there is love in sharing. In fact there is no relationship if you can’t share whatever you have with your partner. I will get to explain what I meant by selfish in this article and why you should be selfish.

Most people in life do things for their selfish interest , but we are talking about relationship so all the points will be about relationship. A guy see a girl, with a good body structure, he lust after her and went ahead to woo her, his intention was just to sleep with her but its now left for the lady in question to be make the right decision , the decision the lady is about to make is a selfish one just to protect her own interest which is a good one.

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We are to be in control of our emotions, you should be in control of your heart and you must always be ready to take the right decision at any time. This decision might be selfish but its for your own good because if you leave yourself out and consider the other person instead, when the problem starts you will be the only one to suffer and bear it.

Let’s look at it again from this angle, you are in a relationship, you are both in love with yourself, deeply in love and you are planning to get married before the bombshell which is you are both AS. This is very heart breaking, you love each other, you don’t want to let go but the right thing to do is to let go. One of you might be saying don’t worry, it’s nothing, we can work it out, we can go to the doctor and time it , we will pray to God about it. Fine, our God is a merciful God and there is nothing impossible for him to do but in this case is better you face the reality. You have to be totally selfish in this situation, you have to forget the feelings of your partner and think about your own feelings and your unborn children. You have to break his/her heart, you have to hurt him/her. Let’s say you overlooked it and eventually got married, everything was fine at the beginning until you gave birth and maybe they are AS, after some years they started having their medical crises and maybe later you find out that your husband has kids outside. What will you do?

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There are many more situations like this, when your partner won’t want to let go, they will beg you, they might go crazy, they might be devastated but nobody can treat you better than yourself, nobody can make you happy than yourself , you know what’s right for you, you know what you want, so it’s better you quit if everything you are getting it’s not what suits you or what you want for yourself because if you want to manage it, you can’t manage It for long and at the end you will be so miserable which won’t bother your partner.

People will give you advice, people will condemn you, they will say so many things but the fact still remains, if you follow them you bear the consequences, if you don’t follow them you and follow you own advice, you will bear the consequences but you are the only one that can tell yourself what’s best for you. I’m not saying you shouldn’t listen to advice, it’s a very good thing to ask for knowledge but at the end you’re the one wearing the shoe and you know exactly where it hurts.

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A lady chatted me up for advice one day and she told me her boyfriend wants her to borrow him some money. Fine, I don’t see any problem with it until she told me the money is much and if he fails her, it’s going to have a very drastic effect on her and she might never be able to get up on her feets again. There is nothing bad with her borrowing the boyfriend the money but she has to take into consideration her personal life too. If the guy should fail, and by the way he’s a boyfriend which means he can break up with the girl and disappear with the money, what will be the faith of the lady. She might go mad and never be normal again. Men too should take note of this fact. If it’s dangerous to your life and health, don’t do it. Besides the person that truly loves you won’t allow or tell you to do something that’s dangerous to you life.

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The partner that told you, you shouldn’t worry that he/she is there for you can disappear when the problem starts, the weird part is, he might even be the one or part of the people creating the problem. Or do you think I’m making it up? With the example I make with genotype, you have kids that are AS, you think your husband can’t tell you, woman I can’t be wasting money all your sick children, you can’t give me healthy children so it’s your cross. Don’t let it be too late, before it gets to that point, be selfish and take your decision. If the relationship is nothing to write about, quit. Do not force it, do not patch it, do not manage it into marriage and do not stay because you have pity on your partner because your partner might not have pity on you later on.

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